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the sound [10 Feb 2010|11:55pm]
[ mood | crappy ]

a bulletin i posted earlier on myspace.

"i dont want to sound like a bitch.

but until you hold 5 dead babies in your hands....you havent felt pain like this. you will never understand pain like this. 2 were born dead and the last 3 didnt even have a chance. no matter how hard me and my dad tried to save them..they didnt have a chance. they wouldnt breathe. they didnt have a chance and im so sad. theyre in a shoebox in the garage...and tomorrow morning i have to bury them...i refuse to let my parents jus, throw them in the garbage. ive been depressed, distressed and so out of sorts. partaking in drugs doesnt even help null the pain anymore.

once you realize how corrupt and materialistic everyone around you is...open your eyes. realize that the world around us is collapsing. enjoy your friends. enjoy the fact that they call you jus to talk, to hear your voice. i am SO grateful to have such wonderful people in my life. i want nothing but the best for you, for ALL of you.

i hate when youre trying to get someones attention before they hang up the phone, to tell they how much they mean to you, and that youre sorry for ever hurting them, and that you love them......and they hang up on you. not because they were bein a dick...but because they werent paying attention."

my pitbull, jamaica, had her puppies today. they were all born premature and they all died. ive been so out of sorts. ive been crying, snapping at everyone. i dont mean to react like this but im so hurt. im so sad. plus doing that heroin fucked with me so much. ive been sick for days, and im jus now getting better. took half a bar earlier and i feel so much better.

if you have the chance, please watch these videos.

the links to them can be found here. PLEASE. its only about 2 hrs per movie, but you will feel so enlightened after watching them. jus give it a chance.

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1 dont choke when you smoke

[05 May 2009|03:18pm]
"When we are incomplete we're always searching for somebody to complete us. When, after a few years or few months of a relationship, we find that we're still unfulfilled, we blame our partners and take up with somebody more promising. This can go on and on--series polygamy--until we admit that while a partner can add sweet dimensions to our lives, we, each of us, are responsible for our own fulfillment. Nobody else can provide it for us, and to believe otherwise is to delude ourselves dangerously and to program for eventual failure every relationship we enter."
-Still Life With Woodpecker, Tom Robbins
2 dont choke when you smoke

[20 Apr 2009|10:45pm]
The only way to deal with an unfree world is to become so absolutely free that your very existence is an act of rebellion

-Albert Camus
dont choke when you smoke

[04 Feb 2009|02:35pm]
dont choke when you smoke

[29 Sep 2008|12:39pm]

dont choke when you smoke

im ridin spinners, im ridin spinners [11 Mar 2007|04:53pm]
[ mood | cheerful ]

Tell me what you think of me.
Tell me what you see when you look at me.
Be brutally honest.

1 dont choke when you smoke

locked [16 Jan 2006|01:54pm]

Formally known as BANGheartbrake.

Comment, add me & I will probally add you back.

13 dont choke when you smoke

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